jobless for 9 weeks now and bored for 7 of them. what has the 7 weeks of boredom wrought?
around the middle especially. this is bothering me more than i can even put into words. other than:
i feel fat.
(i know i’m not fat, i just don’t like this squishiness i’ve accumulated)
see, i’ve never worked out or gone to the gym or really done anything that would help tone me. i apparently have sensible eating habits and a good metabolism, thus far anyways…
since i have been out of work i have spent entirely too much time just sitting. at least at work i was sitting but i did not have access to foods other than what i brought with me. so my weight stayed around the 125 mark. now, i’m up at 132, which is what i weighed in high school, but i think some of it has changed to squish vs the muscle i had (no clue where it came from).
i need to fix this. i do not like feeling fat and at this point all my friends have access to a gym and are working out.
and me? i don’t.
i should get back into running again, that is something i could do. ‘cept i accidentally washed the iPod i used for running, an iPod mini.
yeah, talented right?
ok, ok, the main issue is i got bit by a dog the last time i went running in my neighborhood, which makes me dread running around town for the small likelihood that it would happen again.
i should just get over that. easier said then done though.
ugh. i have got to get out of this rut!
i want to look young and be hot forever. the squish is the opposite of that. *sigh*
an open letter to the people in our lives that we don’t want to be friends with/date:
really, you’d think that after however many years it’s been that you would just take the hint. i’ve been nice, i’ve demurred, i’ve out and out told you i’m not interested. don’t you think that if i wanted to hang with you i would find the time? do you think the passage of time is going to change my mind?
why do you keep texting me, chatting with me on facebook, inviting me to parties? please, just STOP!
do i invite you to go drinking with me? do i text just to say hi? do i invite you to do anything?
no, no i don’t.
please don’t make me be a bitch.
1. you are a nice person (i just don’t see us having anything in common.)
2. i’m not attracted to you.
3. i don’t have anything i want to talk to you about, not even inane things.
4. i treat you like i treat everyone else. (i must be too nice)
how do you deal with this? i’m apparently not doing it right.
well,apparently i am a time traveler because i lost a day. saturday to be exact. i hate that. the cause of this fast forward to sunday? drinking, namely me drinking too much. yeah. i have really got to stop this. the day after is too much for me. i have got to stop accepting drinks from people, that is the cause. my inability to say no and the fact that i’m a small person with a low tolerance (compared to my friends anyways).
i was in bed for hours today, at least 8 or 9. i still feel shittier then all get out. i suppose it is time for a ton of advil and some water. hopefully i wake up tomorrow without this headache. (it’s going on day 3, it’s not from the hangover i had the headache before i even started drinking. another reason i shouldn’t have gone.)
this is the queen of the idiots, i’m out.
apparently i decided to blog last night, which is fine. other then the fact that i did it while drunk.
great restraint self, great restraint.
as i published it and it is coherent, i’m going to leave it up. what’s the point of a blog if i overly censor myself?
note to self: no more depressing drunk posts. ridiculous ones are okay. from now on i’m going to leave them as drafts til sober me takes a look at them.