i have often been in discussions about loyalty. what is loyalty, really?

as defined by dictionary.com

loyalty –noun, plural -ties.

1. the state or quality of being loyal;  faithfulness to commitments or obligations.
2. faithful adherence to a sovereign, government, leader,cause, etc.
3. an example or instance of faithfulness, adherence, or the like: a man with fierce loyalties.

way to go dictionary.com, defining the term while using the root word. *slow clap*

so, let’s define loyal then:
loyal – adjective

1. faithful to one’s sovereign, government, or state: a loyal subject.
2. faithful to one’s oath, commitments, or obligations: to be loyal to a vow.
3. faithful to any leader, party, or cause, or to any person  or thing conceived as deserving fidelity: a loyal friend.

k, then. that helps a helluva lot more. my main topic of discussion is definition number 3’s example: loyalty to one’s friends.

see, where my big issue on loyalty is: (please feel free to imagine me being melodramaticly loud here)
why the hell are you being a loyal friend to someone who is a terrible human being?!

i’ve wanted to say that to quite a few people, quite a few times over the years. so what if you’ve known them forever. so what if they don’t have many friends. so what if you only have a few friends.

so what, so what, so what!

if the person in question is an obvious user and by that i mean has you pay for everything, drive everywhere, takes advantage of you, treats you as less than you deserve to be treated AND (icing on the cake here) you complain about them all the time….

why are you still friends? no, really. can you tell me that please? i’d LOVE an answer that has actual merit.

*yawn* i thought so.

i am slowly moving towards the ol’ disappearing act with a few people. you know, the one where you gradually stop talking and the only time you see  each other  is when you happen to cross paths on a mutual friends facebook wall…

don’t act like you don’t know what i’m talking about. i’m sure you’ve done it. i’m at least owning up to it.

this also occurs when a friendship has run its natural course. i can’t tell you have many friends this has happened with. maybe you no longer have the class together or you’ve both changed considerably and have nothing in common anymore or , well, you just don’t want to effort anymore. it happens. you can always look back on the good times….were there good times? there had to be good times….right?

*shakes head* either way. i just don’t get why people put up with other people being crappy friends. if someone is being a crappy friend and you want to continue being friends with them talk to them about your issues. if they don’t want to hear it or don’t want to change or effort then you have two choices here:

1. stay friends with them and stop bitching about their behavior.
2. cut them out of your life

please, for my sanity, put your big girl panties on and deal with it!
or in your case gents, grow a pair.

i’d greatly appreciate it.


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